25 NOTES ON DANCE & LIFE
Dear Dancer: 25 notes on dance + life
I originally shared these at the start of the year on my birthday after reflecting on lessons I’ve learned these past 30-something years.
One big thing on my mind – then and now – is the magic of 7 years.
The end of 2025 will mark seven years since the darkest point of my mental and physical health challenges. Seven years since recognizing my world needed to change in big ways if I was going to live a full and wholehearted life. Seven years since I began the process of coming home to my Self, my heart, and my health.
When I look around me now, the people I am surrounded by, the extraordinarily special (and handsome 😭) man by my side, the work I have the privilege of immersing myself in, the students I have the honour of working with… it’s wild to think back to when my life felt so far from here.
Everything is temporary. The good and the bad, the easy and the hard, the light and the heavy. The upcoming year – or season, in this case – will bring what it does, but in this moment, on this day, I am drinking in the love that lifts me up and savouring the joy of being alive.
I invite you to join me, to reflect on where you’re coming from, where you want to go, and the lessons you’ve learned that can help you on your way.
We can do this.
With kindness,
xo Bo
Forgive yourself for what you did to survive, AND learn how to support yourself in new and different ways should you find yourself there again.
Health is everything. Nothing is worth the sacrifice of your mental or physical well-being. No one wins in a game that costs you everything.
Honour your body. Rest. Sleep. Move. Learn how to nourish your energy by understanding nutrition separately from aesthetic or thinness.
Get out of your own way. Know what you want and believe you are capable (and deserving) of doing everything possible to try and achieve it.
Pay attention to what gives you energy and lights you up. Lean into this. Pay attention to what drains and exhausts you. Why? Can you change it? Leave it? Let it go?
Find your people, and when you do, nurture them, love them, and let them love you too!
Your timeline is unique to you. Notice where comparison and competition creep in. What is it you really want? How can you get there on your time?
Failure is essential. It is where and how we learn our biggest lessons; the ones we’ll never forget. Aim for excellence, strive to do your best, AND refuse to let the fear of failure be the reason you stop before you try.
Quitting is not the same as giving up. Quitting is strategic, grounded in evidence and data, serving a purpose. Knowing when to quit, to change paths, to shift gears, is part of moving forward.
Know what you’re aiming for. Say yes to things that get you closer and no to that which pulls you away.
Not all relationships are meant to last a lifetime. This doesn’t make them less meaningful. We can still honour how they impacted our lives and hearts.
What you have to offer the world matters. Stand strong in your gifts and share them however you can. You are more than one thing. You are infinite possibilities and potential. Let yourself explore what calls your name.
The act of creation – art, love, relationship, feeling, work – is at the centre of meaning making. Create with care. Create with intention.
Be generous in your assumptions. Trust that everyone is doing the best they can and set your boundaries accordingly.
Consistency over intensity. Small actions add up.
Be your own biggest advocate. Stand up and speak up for what you need. When you do this, others are reminded that they can too.
YOU ARE ALWAYS ALLOWED TO LEAVE.
Sometimes it’s okay to speak in anger. Sometimes they need to know you’re angry. Sometimes they need to know what happened was not okay.
We are responsible for our healing and feelings. This is a lifelong practice. We keep doing the best we can. Learn new tools and skills. Lean into community and stay curious about how to best support what you need.
Sometimes the consequence is worth it. Again,you’re always allowed to leave.
There is a difference between confidence and conceit. Believing you are good enough, ready for responsibility, and deserving of your flowers does not make you arrogant. Treating others as though they are not equally deserving in their own right is what makes the difference.
Own your mistakes. Admit when you’re wrong. Repair when you’ve caused harm. Learn how to do better, then do better.
Say it out loud if it needs to be known. No one can read your mind. You deserve to speak your truth.
Tell people the good, the beauty, the light you see in them. Love out loud, and loudly
Multiple truths can exist at once. Always always always. Both/and forever.
